Ten Minutes

I became a nurse to help people. I still want to help people. But some days I can’t even help myself get out of the car in the driveway. I sit there for ten minutes before I go inside, just breathing, just existing in the space between work Elena and home Elena.

Ten Minutes

Marcus knows. He doesn’t ask questions or try to fix it. He just brings me coffee in the driveway now. Sometimes he sits with me, sometimes he gives me the space. Today he handed me my favorite mug and said ‘take your time, babe. Sophie’s helping Theo with his backpack.’ A year of pandemic nursing has taken something out of me that I’m not sure how to get back. The kids I take care of, their families, my colleagues - everyone is running on empty and somehow we keep showing up. But some days the only way I can keep showing up for everyone else is to first sit in my driveway and remember who I am outside of the scrubs. Thank you for the coffee, Marcus. Thank you for knowing exactly what I needed before I did.